Starring Harry Secombe, Peter Sellers and Spike Milligan
Announcer: Wallace Greenslade
Music by Max Geldray and The Ray Ellington Quartet
The Orchestra was conducted by Wally Stott
Script: Spike Milligan
Producer: Peter Eton
Recorded: Sunday 3 October 1954
First Broadcast : Tuesday 5 October 1954 on the BBC Home Service
The lost gold mine was alleged to have been found by the French miner, André Charlotte, who died without telling anyone where it was. But he left behind a map, which was discovered in a tin of meatloaf salad by Neddie Seagoon. Seagoon sets off for America. On board ship, he plays cards with Captain Grytpype and Moriarty, and loses. He doesn’t have the threepence he owes, so he writes them an IOU on the back of the treasure map. Grytpype and Moriarty divide the map in half so that neither can cheat the other. On arrival in New Orleans, Neddie discovers the loss of the map and sets out across the desert in pursuit of Grytpype and Moriarty. He stays the night in an inn operated by Minnie and Henry. While there, he meets Bloodnok who reveals that Grytpype and Moriarty passed through town only hours earlier, and they set off in pursuit. They find Moriarty chained and buried in the sand up to his neck. Moriarty still has half the treasure map, and the half that matters – the half with the last mile that leads to the gold mine. Seagoon and Bloodnok divide that part of the map in two, and, in return for Moriarty telling them which way Grytpype went, each give Moriarty half of their portion of the map. Meanwhile, ten miles ahead in the desert, Grytpype discovers that this is as far as his part of the map leads him. He meets Eccles, who reveals that he lives in the gold mine, but never left with the treasure because he only knows his way from the gold mine to where Grytpype is. In return for half of Grytpype’s map, he agrees to show Grytpype where the mine is. Seagoon and Moriarty now have reached the spot where Grytpype met Eccles. Here they find desert ranger Bluebottle, who agrees to guide them to the mine. Bluebottle and Seagoon have now caught up with Eccles. The lost gold mine is behind a pile of rocks. Bluebottle sets three sticks of dynamite to blast away the rocks, but Eccles presses the plunger too soon and Bluebottle is deaded in the explosion. Inside the mine, Seagoon discovers that there is no gold. Eccles, tells him, well, that’s yer lot.
The Goon Show Preservation Society 