Starring: Peter Sellers and Spike Milligan with Kenneth Connor
Announcer: Wallace Greenslade
Music by Max Geldray and The Ray Ellington Quartet
The Orchestra was conducted by Wally Stott
Script: Spike Milligan
Producer: John Browell
Recorded: Sunday 22 February 1959
First Broadcast : Monday 23 February 1959 on the BBC Home Service
Harry Secombe was absent.
Kenneth Connor, part of the variety act Le Trois Toms des Acton, breaks both his legs on stage. Doctors Grytpype and Moriarty examine his wallet and diagnose Kenny as suffering from advanced poverty. They prescribe him £50 to cure it. They keep his legs until they’re mended and send Kenny off on a pair of skates. He goes to the Bank of England to have the prescription filled. The disguised Moriarty and Grytpype rob him of the money and then, posing again as the doctors, write him a fresh prescription and send him to a National Health Hospital. There they shovel coins into his mouth. He’s taken from the hospital and incarcerated in Holloway Women’s Prison, but released for 24 hours to try to track down the villains and regain possession of his legs. However, he remains chained to the prison. Meanwhile, Min boils up Henry’s laundry into a soup that turns Old Uncle Oscar into a chicken. Connor shows up, seeking lodging for the night. Min offers him the attic, where he could stay with the two gentlemen doctors. The police arrive. Grytpype and Moriarty are surrounded. They threaten to put Kenny’s legs in the mincer, but under attack from Bluebottle’s Finchley gang they give up. They invite everyone inside for a bowl of nice laundry soup. With the entire cast turned into chickens, the Goons and the orchestra sing “We’ll Gather Lilacs”.
The Goon Show Preservation Society 